I really, truely want one of these . . .
Any one of these would do - really.
But unless I was prepared to take on the national debt, these beauties (if you can find them here) are waaaaaaaaaaaaay outa my budget.
So I got one of these beautifully crafted blow molded plastic flesh coloured half thingies complete with hanger.
With a bit of judicious draping and selected camera angles it did the job - just.
Problem was, hanging on the wall, wearing the little shirt that did not quite cover the lady parts, the dummy succeeded in offended me so, a date with the 4 inch grinder equipped with a metal cutting blade solved the problem.
Then UV light stepped in and the flesh tone slowly morphed into a billious yellow like terminal liver failure.
I spray painted it off white, which only served to accent the tiny texture of the surface and made it even shinier. This resulted in ages in Photoshop and that was another whole other to do.
A bit of internet trawling and perhaps covering it in tissue paper appeared to be the answer. No wait, if I was really clever, I could make two forms, one dark and one light,
Now if I wrapped the form in cling wrap and covered it with tissue paper that could be form 1. I could cover the dummy with tissue paper and that could be form 2.
Should work right?
Wrapped the form in cling wrap with bits of duct tape to hold stuff in place. Next started gluing. Didn't have sheets of tissue paper so tried Kleenex which refused to stick to the cling wrap and instead clung lovingly to my brush and fingers. Painted all the cling wrap with glue and let it dry. Then tried again with Kleenex, same result. Then tried using strips of toilet paper. This turned into a pulpy mess that stuck in places, and bubbled in others resulting in a surface that hinted at developing malignant growths.
Tore everything off and stuffed cling wrap and pulpy mess, garbage bags,into the bin and spent ages washing the stick concoction off my hands.
Clearly some recovery time sulking under the table sucking my thumb was called for.
As luck would have it, while rummaging around in the back of the shed, came across a roll of lightweight wrapping paper that had been there since we moved. The paper had aged to a soft buff and should be strong enough to take the glue and manipulation.
Torn strips, watered down PVA glue and the first layer is drying in the sun.
Another layer and although better than the white plastic surface it lacked visual guts. (In my mind's eye I envisaged something akin the surface colouration of my battered frypan and baking tray.
A bit of metalic gold added to the PVA glue followed by a sploodging of black - yeah sploodging is too a word!
Better but not quite right.
More dark stuff added to the PVA but the surface was too visually busy.
Went with a coat of dark grey which is closeish the to background I shoot on.
Sprayed it with matt clear, and my idea of matt is clearly not the same as the manufacturer's idea of matt. Didn't even slow the shine down.
Got into it with some fine sandpaper which did improve it. Will work on matting the surface further and see how I like it.
If I hate it too much there is always a coat of lovely dead matt potters plaster.